November 26, 2008
Acts 2:17-28
In the last days, God says, I will pour out my Spirit on all people. Your sons and your daughters will prophesy, your young men will see visions, your old men will dream dreams. Even on my servants, both men and women, I will pour out my Spirit in those days, and they will prophesy.
I will show wonders in the heaven above and signs on the earth below, blood and fire and billows of smoke. The sun will be turned to darkness and the moon to blood before the coming of the great and glorious day of the Lord.
And everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.
Men of Israel, listen to this: Jesus of Nazareth was a man accredited by God to you by miracles, wonders and signs, which God did among you through him, as you yourselves know. This man was handed over to you by God’s set purpose and foreknowledge; and you, with the help of wicked men, put him to death by nailing him to the cross.
BUT GOD raised him from the dead, freeing him from the agony of death, because it was IMPOSSIBLE for death to keep its hold on him. David said about him:
I saw the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I WILL NOT BE SHAKEN. Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will live in hope, because you will not abandon me to the grave, nor will you let your Holy One see decay. You have made known to me the paths of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence.
Acts 2:36 “Therefore let all Israel be assured of this: God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Christ.”
Acts 2: 38-40 Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. The promise is for you and your children and for ALL who are a FAR OFF—for all whom the Lord our God will call.”
With many other words he warned them; and he pleaded with them, “Save yourselves from this corrupt generation.”
I say the same to you; the promise is there for all of us. It is the same for us as it was for them!
If you would like to accept Jesus as your Savior today pray out loud the following and have something truly thankful to be for this Thanksgiving Day.
Jesus, I believe you are my Savior and I receive all that you have for me. I know I am a sinner and that I confess to you. Come into my life and make me whole, be the Lord of my life. Amen
PS. Notice the word BUT GOD above and realize what that means in your situation, in Danni's situation. When you look at all your facing remember....BUT GOD! HE CAN CHANGE EVERYTHING!
Praises Along the Way- Call Me Crazy...I Believe!
Waiting for an Answer to Prayer
November 25, 2008
Danni is deteriorating quickly it seems, I won't go into detail but I think we will say that she needs a miracle and we are down to the wire.
Believe me when I say that I very much understand that healing comes in many forms and I am not holding God to a particular form, that is his business with Danni and none of mine.
After seeing the kind of suffering I have seen the last 10 months, I am asking God for healing mercy of ANY kind!
I do, however, hold unwavering and undoubting to the FACT that God CAN heal her on this earth IF HE so chooses!
SO...Please pray that we get her new pain meds working properly. Pain meds are not something we want a lapse in and they are trying some new things for her all mixed into 1 thing that we can give every 4 hours or so.
This has become necessary because Danni is having a lot of trouble swallowing pills. She is having quite a bit of pain and anxiety when she is conscience.
Well, I'm falling asleep while writing this so if it isn't making much sense that's why. Anyways, GOD IS GOOD TO US ALL THE TIME! GOD IS IN CONTROL! And thanks for your continued prayers!
New Condition Developments
November 24, 2008
I'm sorry to report that there have been some changes in Danni's physical condition. She's become very vocal in the last couple of days groaning or talking constantly, sometimes very loud at times. We think that the tumors have invaded her language area.
She is also having trouble at times swallowing and this morning I noticed that she wasn't tracking with her eyes so I'm not sure if she can still see or not. It's hard for her to tell hot from cold and up from down.
Her condition seems to be rapidly deteriorating at some moments and then at others she's wide awake talking and joking and eating and swallowing just fine. I feel like we're on a roller coaster never knowing when we'll be jerked one way or the other.
She hasn't been pulling her oxygen out like she had been before so that's a blessing that we don't have to watch her like a hawk. Danni has also begun to refuse her meds at times. She understands what is going on so I've given her the independance she needs to decide for herself if she wants them.
It seems that it's very difficult most times to get her to wake up. I've been researching these things online and I feel we're getting near to the end. She's so fragile, it is the Lord who is sustaining her, but then again he has all along.
Please continue to agree with us for the Lord's will in this situation. I have no doubt in my mind that my God is able to heal but as his thoughts are higher than my thoughts and his ways higher than mine all I can do is agree with God that his will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
I am submitted to God and Danni and I are at the foot of the cross sitting and waiting patiently for God to deliver her.
Praises Along the Way--The Deposit
November 22, 2008
It had been a good day, or so we thought, Danni had everyone in stitches! She was her ornery self joking with everyone. The problem came at 1 in the morning when she couldn’t stop talking… “How do I relax, mom?” she said. She couldn’t stop talking, her chest was hurting, “heart hurt, heart hurt,” was what she said to me.
“My side hurts and my shoulder, 7, 8, 9,” she went on to say indicating the level of pain from 1 to 10, 10 being the most painful. I called the nurse, apparently her anxiety had been building all day and night into the next morning, I knew that something wasn’t right.
We determined that Danni had a tolerance to the anxiety meds she was taking and needed something different, they weren't working anymore.
I sat by her bed and held her hand to keep her from picking at herself from mounting anxiety. She fought with every breath to keep herself calm. Prayer came forth from her spirit like I have never heard from her.
“Father, give me the strength and courage I need to be more like you, touch and heal me, take the pain from my side.. help me to be more like you, give me courage and strength so that I can lead people to you…help so and so thank you for giving them the understanding to help us understand the scriptures…give them courage and strength to be more like you and do your will….”
On and on she went using her labored breath to pray for herself to be more like her heavenly father and praying with honest concern for others. I sat there amazed at what I was hearing, the Spirit inside of her was taking control and taking the awful circumstances she was in to cause her to cry out to him to be more like him, to bless others, to protect others and to make good come from bad.
At three we knew the nurse would be on her way with the new anxiety meds and I couldn’t take it anymore. I was exhausted and Matt said, “Go to bed, I’ll sit with her.” As he sat with her she was whispering things to him. He couldn’t hear what she was saying so he got down so he could hear clearly. “Do you think Mal and Wes will be okay?” she said “You tell them I’m praying for them every day…”
Mal and Wes are Danni’s step-sister and brother, Matt’s children. Matt broke. Once again her concern with the breath she had was for someone else. This doesn’t come from her as an individual but from the Holy Spirit that lives within her.
Romans 8:26 says, “In the same way the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express…”
He comes along side; he walks with us and even prays for us! What a vivid expression of this we witnessed as the Holy Spirit rose in Danni and prayed through her prayers of faith and deliverance. It was a beautiful, awe inspiring thing to behold.
The word is true! We can put our faith in it! We can believe what it says! What a comfort in such a dark time to see that God was still in control. As bad as the circumstances were, the Spirit was revealing himself to us through Danni.
The nurse came around 7am and administered the new meds to her and I’m told she went right to sleep. She was exhausted and so were we but what a privilege to actually see the deposit of the Holy Spirit within her guaranteeing what is to come! (2 Corinthians 1:22, 2 Cor. 5:5 and Ephesians 1:14) What rest for a mother’s heart.
Praises Along the Way--Goodness from Badness :)
November 19, 2008
Round about 3 am this morning Danni was having quite a bit of pain in her right shoulder and side and her head was hurting as well. These are new developments. She was also having trouble breathing.
So the nurse came out and assessed her. Her oxygen level was good but the pain meds weren't covering the extra pain she was having so we increased her pain meds and steroid dosage.
The breathing pattern change, loss of use of her arm and headache are probably tumor related.
The Lord has been blessing her abundantly lately. He moved on the heart of one of her friend's mom to make her a colorful blanket with pictures of all her friends and family it blessed us all greatly.
Matt G came and sang her his song and we were blessed. Then today the UPS truck brought her a freshly baked shoefly pie from her uncle in PA. What yummy surprise! Also, a lady came to the door with free flowers. She had been chosen to receive them from a local business and she had several friends come to see her. It has been a very blessed day and couple of weeks.
God's love continues to be poured out in truck loads! God is so charming! He is thoughtful and kind, moving on the hearts of his people to bless us and remind us of his goodness in our darkest of hours.
What a wonderful God we serve, what a friend who loves us to the end and beyond! His love never ends it endures forever! We wait patiently upon him and treasure every day. Thank you God for your goodness! I praise you!
Praises Along the Way--The Race and the Cycle.
November 15, 2008
Sitting in her quiet room I can hear the machines humming in the background. It’s so hard to know what to do. She seems to be having more pain today. She’s confused easily and she is having a hard time catching her breath. Why wouldn’t she? She’s running a marathon called life. She’s straining hard with every breath. Her heart pounds harder with every step toward the goal.
She whispers encouragement to herself. “Okay, what do we do next?” “Stay calm, your job is to stay calm” “Okay, thank you” “Calm, calm, calm.”
She’s hot then the next minute she’s cold but her skin feels the same. Is she talking with God? We wonder amongst ourselves. Maybe this is going on, maybe that is going on…we run the scenarios over and over in our minds trying to comprehend where we are at and what is going on.
It’s consuming. Is she near the finish line? Will God intervene? How does all this fit into his plan? “I’m here beside you beloved,” he whispers to me. That still small voice says, “Trust me.” I think this is the hardest test I’ve ever faced. I am learning the true meaning of Psalms 46:10 painted in pretty teal paint on her wall. “Let be and be still and know that I am God,” it says to me. That is so hard, I think to myself.
In our fast pace society it is a real challenge to just sit and be still literally waiting on the Lord to move. I do trivial things; I watch TV or read my bible. I surf the net trying to find any kind of distraction but even the world wide web isn’t enough to take my mind off of act 1, take 1 of the drama unfolding before me.
This race is grueling. We all run together, we are all connected. When she suffers, we suffer. When she has joy, we have joy. The word just can’t be denied, it is true!
I don’t want to do anything but sit in her room and watch her. Will I think back on these days in days to come? What will be happening in a month from now, I wonder. Staying in the day, in the hour, in the minute, in the second is a huge discipline for me.
Everything we’re taught in the beginning of life we have to learn again at the end of life. The cycle of life runs full circle. We begin with someone taking care of us 24 hours a day and we come to the end of the cycle the same way. This life is a strange thing.
I used to take everything for granted, not so anymore. Going through these life altering situations forever changes your perspective on life. Little annoying things don’t seem to matter.
Things that were important fade to black and you wonder what you were thinking when those things held such a prominent place in your every day.
This is therapy for me. Writing helps to free my mind from the millions of thoughts swirling about in my head. Wondering is a heavy taskmaster… if only I could disconnect from it for the rest of this story and just live in the moment enjoying every second as opposed to trying to analyze everything.
My desire to control things runs deep and I am sure that this is an area that is lovingly being disciplined out of me by my doting Father. He watches over me constantly helping me at every turn.
The changes I see in Danni concern me and then I have to remind myself that this is God’s show and he is in charge. Not easily accepted by a control freak! But nevertheless, thy will and not mine. Man, isn’t there any other way this cup can pass? Thy will and not mine. The inner struggle wears me out.
Round and round I go through the cycle mentioned above…no wonder I’m exhausted. I’m a little slow; finally I turn to Jesus and say to him, “help me deal with this, help me run this race with Danni with the same perseverance and courage that she has so graciously displayed.” Jesus, I need your peace, peace that passes all understanding, peace that doesn’t fade, that can’t be taken away from me.
I snuggle my face into the folds of his robe and take a tassel from his garment in my hand running it through my fingers, waiting for his presence to comfort me.
He is faithful, he gathers me in his arms and I receive peace. Thank God for Jesus, he’s all I have and that is more than enough for me.
I need thee, oh, I need thee, every hour I need thee, oh bless me now my Savior, I come to thee. The old hymn runs through my mind like a river refreshing my soul. Thank you Jesus. Thank you Jesus. You never leave or forsake us. You’re just a cry away. My hope is secure in you.
Praises Along the Way--Knowing Him
November 14, 2008
I was discussing with a friend the other day all of Danni’s medical situations when it dawned on me how fragile is her condition. As I thought about this I realized that every day she lives is a miracle! We are seeing miracle after miracle day after day as the Lord gives us fresh mercy. Just one more day with Danni.
Matt led our family to Mark 8 last Sunday. As we read verse by verse stopping at each one that spoke something to us I realized that my focus had been on the miracle instead of the Miracle Maker. I had to repent and get my eyes focused in Jesus’ direction again.
Mark 8 begins with Jesus feeding the four thousand…I love what the Lord says in verses 2-3 he was so concerned about the basic needs of the people. He has compassion when he looks at them and doesn’t want them to collapse.
I thought about the long journey we have been on with Jesus and how he brought this word with compassion to us to help us understand so that we didn’t collapse. Jesus used miracles as a teaching tool to reveal more of who he was to the people.
When Jesus feeds you there is a lot to go around. He fed me, so I will break this bread and fish with you. May it be multiplied to feed multitudes in Jesus Name Amen!
Verse 11 of Mark 8 reads as follows…when he landed on the shore... “the Pharisees came out and began to dispute with Him, seeking from Him a sign from heaven, testing him.”
They wanted a miraculous sign and in verse 12 Jesus tells them they won’t receive a sign. Seeing their hearts he recognized that they just wanted him to prove himself to them and he didn’t see the need, he didn’t answer to them.
He gets back into the boat (vs. 13) and begins to teach his disciples about the attitude they had just encountered in the Pharisees only his disciples have bread on the brain! I laughed out loud at their response and then realized many times it’s my response! Many times I don’t understand what Jesus is saying.
In verses 17-21, Jesus is saying, don’t you get it? It’s about attitudes not bread! If we need more bread I can handle that didn’t I prove that to you? It’s about the attitude that says prove who you are Jesus but the Pharisees wouldn’t have believed even if they would have had a sign. The need for a miraculous sign is a distraction; they didn’t want to know who Jesus was they just wanted proof. God isn’t one to do things because little humans demand.
I used to think that this chain of events was not related but the flow here is beautiful. Next, a blind man is brought to Jesus for him to heal (notice what Jesus says to the disciples in verses 17-18). Jesus first addresses the physical with spitting on the man’s eyes and then asks him if he can see. The man says he sees people and they look like trees.
The disciples and Pharisees were blind as we are many times.
Here is one of the few times when Jesus heals someone that it happens progressively and not immediately. Jesus then lays his hands on him again (vs. 25) and tells him to look up! (NKJ Version) How profound! Look to Jesus! And then the man saw everyone clearly and is told not to tell anyone.
It doesn’t say this but is it possible that the man saw Jesus for who he was (Messiah) as healing was brought to his eyes the second time? Did Jesus heal his physical eyes and then the eyes of his spirit? This is good prayer food!
In verses 27-30 Jesus asked his disciples “Who do men say that I am?” and Peter is divinely given the right answer to the question, “You are the Christ”. Then Jesus tells the disciples not to tell anyone just like he did the blind man. I found this interesting. Perhaps the blind man did receive the revelation of Jesus the Christ.
Jesus does these awesome miracles because he has compassion on the people. He also wants to teach his disciples something about himself. He wants to reveal himself to them so that they would find out more about him. It isn’t so much about the miracle as it is that we get to know him in a deeper way and see him for who he really is…our savior.
I had to think of my motives for asking for a miracle. Motives are important when we are in prayer about anything. (James 4:3) Weren’t my motives to make everything like it was before? End the suffering?
But Jesus looks at me and says, “Who do you say I am?” (Mark 8 27-30) He wants deeper relationship. He wants to reveal himself in a more profound way. He wants us all to know him in a way we never have known. I had to repent of my shallow, selfish thinking.
Whether or not a miracle happens is none of my business. He just wants me to know him more so I asked God to put in me a deep desire to know him more and I will leave all miracles to him.
The scripture goes on in verse 34-38. Here I had to switch to the Message version to understand what Jesus was conveying. It reads like this, “Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You’re not in the driver’s seat; I am. Don’t run from suffering, embrace it. Follow me and I’ll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to saving yourself, your true self. What good would it do to get everything you want and lose you, the real you?...”
In seeking the miracle, I wanted to run from the suffering but this trial must work its deeper work in me that in some way I turn to Jesus and say help me understand, help me to know you and how you work in a deeper way. Let these circumstances bring me into a greater intimacy with you.
This should be my focus, Jesus, and not what he may or may not do for me.
Grateful for Another Day
November 12, 2008
Amazingly Danni's oxygen stats are getting better. Every day they climb a few numbers. She's comfortable and still eating and drinking.
She's been awake and alert off and on. Her lungs sound good but she still needs more healing.
We've done all we can do to stand and so we will continue to stand in faith leaving the miracles to God I will focus on knowing him in a deeper way.
Thank you Jesus for another day with Danni. Thank you for your love and mercy concerning our family. Thank you for answering our prayers. Thank you that you are in control and help us all to come to a deeper knowledge of you through this journey. Amen
P.S. Matt we are looking forward to hearing the song you wrote!
Waiting on the Lord
November 10, 2008
Danni is sleeping a lot these days, she still has somewhat of an appetite but its only at certain times of the day that she wakes up enough to eat. Those times are precious to us as we get some good interaction with her.
We sit with her constantly all day and all night watching and waiting for signs of life or death. She's very quiet because it takes a lot of precious breath and effort to speak. She's still eating and drinking so swallowing isn't a problem at this point.
She has a new infection on her belly that they can do nothing about except cover the wound and give her some antibiotics. She isn't running a fever and we are keeping her as comfortable as possible. Most times she refuses her pain meds but we continue to give her something for anxiety.
This is the point we are at and things are about the same or maybe change slightly every day. Waiting on the Lord.
I'm going to try and get some shut eye, sorry I don't have anything better to report. Thanks for all the continued prayers.
You are all very special people.
Day by Day
November 8, 2008
Days and nights run together. People come and people go from the house bringing love and prayers and food. Some stay the night and others stay for just minutes. Constantly love is poured out over us.
Rest comes in cat naps here and there. Sometimes when I do lay down I can't sleep. I'm tired of decaying flesh. I long for him to come and deliver her, deliver us. Its difficult to wait patiently on the Lord when I see the things I'm seeing.
Watching someone you love so much walk this lonely trail is exhausting, it's painful and I feel so helpless. Looking at pictures of how she used to be and seeing her earthen vessel today I realize how vain is all of the things we do to keep this flesh from wearing out.
I was having a hard time last night and the Lord said Job 23, I expected that he was going to reprimand me for the way I was speaking to him and instead the scripture was exactly how I was feeling. He knows what I'm going through, he watched his son die too.
He put his arm around me in our secret place and pulled me inside of him. He surrounded me with his Spirit, hiding me under his wing. How anyone can say there is no God or that he doesn't care about us, I don't know. He is so loving and kind, so long-suffering with us. He sees our needs and afflictions and gathers us to himself to hide us in him.
I know he's in control and I'm thankful for that but it's very difficult to know how I fit. What am I supposed to do in this whole thing? Painted on Danni's wall is the scripture..."Let be and be still and know that I am God" (Psalms 46:10). Often the Lord reminds me to look at the wall, over and over again he says, "Let be and be still and know that I am God" but what does that mean? How does one do that in the face of such grim circumstances.
"My grace is sufficient for thee, my power is made perfect in weakness," is another scripture on a picture hanging on her wall. How true. Do I completely understand what that means? I would be lying if I said yes. In the last few days, I've gone back to the solid truth...Jesus Christ and him crucified.
I am amazed at myself, up and down, round and round I go. I believe he is able but what is here for her when eternity is so close? She says she wants to live and then she says,"I just don't want to be in pain anymore." What a struggle must be going on inside her.
I have released her! I am not so selfish as to ask her to stay, believing for her healing is not my idea! So heal her God! Hasn't she suffered enough!?
I haven't lost heart or my faith but this whole thing has made me question why it is that I believe what I do about healing. It is such an illusive thing and has little to do with us. Little to do with our "feelings" or the way we pray, all that is flesh.
What it has to do with is God and his will and plan and we are just subject to it. Yes he cares and is a compassionate God but he's is not so impressed with our flesh and it is our eternal soul that matters most to him and rightly so! This life is obviously as the word says a "vapor, mist and flower of the field" it can be taken in an instant by the will of the one who created it and yet we live our lives as if we are in control. What a joke. We are so deceived!
He gives us opportunity after opportunity to come to him and enter into rest and peace and we snub our noses at him as if we have the ability to live our lives apart from him.
People if there is anything that I could say to convince you to accept him as your saviour I would but I fear that those of you who don't believe will continue in your paths until one day God will get your attention.
Out of his deep love for you he will continue to pursue you. I encourage you today to stop, turn around and say to him come into my life, you have my attention. Obviously your life won't be all roses if you come to him as you can plainly see by looking at mine but he will give you the strength in your weakness to be able to endure even the most dire of circumstances with grace and dignity.
Danni's security is set, her crowns are waiting, she let Jesus be Lord of her life and she will be with him at some point in time, eternally at peace. I want that for all of you; that is my prayer for you.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28 He stands, inches from your face waiting for you to answer his invitation. Will you come into his arms of safety and allow him to hide you in himself even as he did for me today? He treats us all the same, what he does for me he will do for you. It's time for you to answer the call.
Diagnosis ...Days
November 6, 2008
We've been told by the doc that Danni may be down to days. It felt so surreal as he told me what we could expect to transpire. I remember thinking to myself ,yea, but God is in control. Often in scripture deliverance didn't come until the very last minute.
I think of Isaac and Abraham in Genesis chapter 22 because God gave me these scriptures last night after I had talked with the doc. Isaac wasn't delivered from the hand of his father Abraham until seconds before his impending death, but God provided a ram for the sacrifice.
Also, in our family devotions time last night Isaiah 60:1-3 was Jessi's scripture that she opened to and then we also read Isaiah 58:8-9. Atlee's scripture that he picked out was Isaiah 28.These were quite an encouragement. Matt's scripture was Luke 13: 22-30 about the narrow door that we must all go through to enter the kingdom.
All of these spoke of God's plans for the future, his sovereignty, power ,judgements and miraculous provision. So we set our face like flint (Isaiah 50:7)and stay the course no matter what the circumstances and we wait for God's sovereign hand of power, judgement and miraculous provision.
Some things are Better...but My Faith is the Same
November 4, 2008
We are continuing to watch Danni around the clock with parents, step-parents, grandparents and tragedy coordinators all taking turns. While Danni is sleeping she itches her nose or rubs her face and knocks her oxygen off quite frequently especially during the night. We put it on as quickly as we can when we see it.
Some things have cleared up including her lungs which are sounding good. We've also been seeing some change in her blood sugar readings that are encouraging. The numbers have been below 200 and one day in particular I didn't give her insulin all day as we were concerned she might bottom out!
Every day I stand and wait to see the deliverance of my God believeing in faith that he will heal her. Morning comes with hopes for the day and evening sets with new challenges to say "be moved, in the Name of Jesus, be cast into the sea!" Waiting is a hard thing but I know its developing patience and perserverance and character and strengh so I praise God even in these most difficult of times.
I am enjoying having family and friends around us all the time. It is such a precious thing to work together for one purpose.
I don't really have anymore to tell you. With round the clock care I'm up all time catching cat naps when I can but mom is always on call :}
Once again I will clearly state that the Lord is going to heal her unto life not healing unto death! She will live to testify of the miraculous healing power of God for the benefit of salvation to others! I agree with those of you who say she will be healed! By Him and for Him and through Him...All about Him! Souls for the kingdom...salvation to all who recieve Him! AMEN!
Change Comes Quickly...Never Give Up!
November 1, 2008
Danni was having some anxious moments last night and several times in the night without knowing it she took her oxygen off. I slept in a chair with one of the tragedy coordinators nearby on her little red couch. I had to sleep in the chair near her to put the oxygen back into her nose.
Today has also been an anxious day for her when she is awake. After speaking with the hospice nurse today, we've decided to keep her medicated on a regular basis to keep her calm rather than just when she thinks she needs it. Danni was in agreement when I told her the nurse said that she really should be taking the meds on a scheduled basis.
Her breathing is the major issue.
Nevertheless, we will not give up hope that the Lord will heal her! NEVER GIVE UP! That's what Danni said she had learned and so we will NEVER GIVE UP HOPE! AMEN!
Its a Good Day.
October 31, 2008
Danni is having a good day. She seems to be feeling a bit better. I thank God for giving us the meds we need to keep her comfortable. Her lungs are sounding better and she's still eating and resting well.
For the first time in days her sugar has been below 300 so that's a good sign that she's healing too. I continue to stand firm in my belief that she'll be raised out of her sick bed and made well. We've had some awesome times of prayer recently as we laid our hands on her.
I'm confident that God has more for her to do and I stand believing no matter what things "look" like!(Hebrews 11:1) Faith is for right now! It is "now faith" not later faith. God is in her and he is far bigger (1John 4:4) than anything the enemy can throw at us, she is equipped with all she needs (Eph 6, 2Peter 1:3). God is for her who can be against her?(Romans 8:31) Not the "name"of cancer or pneumonia or any other thing that would seek to raise its ugly head.(Phil 2:10) They were all defeated on the cross with the stripes laid on Christ's back.(Isaiah 53:5)
Woo Hoo thank you Jesus! You are supreme! You are awesome in your power! I BELIEVE!
Praises Along the Way--Changes
October 27, 2008
The weather is changing and while its getting colder outside the warmth of Danni's heart is still becoming more beautiful each day. She is a light burning brightly. Yesterday we had our time together with our family reading the word and praying. We talked about Hebrews 11, commonly known as the "faith chapter" and also chapter 12.
We discussed how we go through disciplines that increase our faith and cause us to grow closer to God. The word says in Hebrews 12:7 to "endure hardship as discipline" and that the discipline comes to those God loves (vs.6). When we had finished talking about these things we all went around and said what it was that we have learned in the past 9 months.
Jessi (15) was the first to speak and she said she had become very curious as to what God's plan was for her life. Atlee (10) said that he had learned that "we can't do the things that God can do." Matt said that he had learned more about God's love and mercy also that God is in control. My ideas were along the lines of what Matt and Atlee had said but Danni's were different. She said that she had learned to "trust God and never ever give up."
Nothing blesses a mom's heart more than to know their child has given themselves to the purposes of God wholeheartedly. If through all these circumstances of discipline Danni came near to God and fully gave herself to him then all the struggle and pain has produced a "harvest of righteousness" (Heb. 12:11). The word "discipline" used here does not mean punishment but in the sense that an athlete "disciplines" his body for the race to make it stronger. (Heb. 12:1)
I love it when the Lord brings his word into our lives and shows us through situations exactly what he means by what he has spoken. It's a beautiful thing.
Things are also changing with Danni's pain, it has increased and where she didn't have pain before now she has pain. It has moved from her right shoulder to her right ribs, at this point it doesn't matter what the pain is coming from our goal is to keep her comfortable so we've changed pain meds from the current ones she is taking to others that are much stronger.
She still has her sense of humor even with all she's facing. Yesterday I gave her a pill for her to swallow and she lifted her hand palm up to the ceiling. She was moving her arm up and down so I asked her if she wanted the head of the bed up higher and she said, "No, I'm dancing!" So funny!
I'm so grateful that she's home and that we live in a country where we can get the meds we need to keep the pain at bay, where she can lay in an air bed to keep her skin well, where people pull together no matter what walk of life they are from to give of themselves in such loving ways.
Lord, I thank you and I praise you for your love and provision for us! You are awesome! Your yoke is light and your burden is easy. Thank you for bearing the weight of this on your shoulders as it would easily crush us into dust. I praise you, I praise you, I praise you! You are good all the time!
More Praises Along the Way--Three Ring Minnick House!
October 24, 2008
The day started out like normal, up at 4 am to give Danni meds and then a breathing treatment. Check her sugar and get her a bowl of cereal then a big shot of insulin. A couple of phone calls from friends to see how the night went and if we needed anything.
I had a wonderful, encouraging phone call with more friends, lunch, more insulin and some pills for Danni. Danni’s doctor also came to the house with a nurse that had taken care of her at the hospital to check on us and listen to her lungs.
I caught a little nap before the aide came with the hospice nurse hot on her heals and then came the bed guy. We got Danni an air bed to help prevent anymore bed sores. There was only one problem, we had to get Danni out of the bed completely for it to be installed because the old mattress had to come off….here’s where the day got interesting.
The nurse, aide and I decided that we could try to contact the fire department to help us move her since she can’t walk or even sit up by herself. I called the chief and he said he’d round up some guys and be there in a few minutes. What an awesome fire department we have!
In the mean time, I started for Danni’s room when I heard guitar music. "Where could that be coming from?" I thought to myself. There in the corner was the mattress guy with Matt’s guitar. “Ok, whatever, go with the flow” I thought, I was glad he felt comfortable enough to play. I come from a family of musicians and Matt is a musician so I understand how that all works, instruments are irresistable to them!
By that time the six, or was it seven fire fighters had arrived with back board in hand. We bundled her up in the sheets on the bed and lifted her over enough to get her on the board. Then the guys belted her in for her “magic carpet ride” and lifted her off of the bed.
The nurse, Danni’s step-mom and I grabbed the old mattress and took it off the frame. At which time the mattress dude did his thing with the new air mattress. God had provided again, man, he’s good!!
She lay on the backer board with the fireman all around holding her in midair until the mattress guy was done. Then they laid her gently back on the bed and carefully took the board out from under her. The “carpet” had landed and Danni was safe in her bed again.
In an instant the firefighters were out the door and the aide and nurse where finishing Danni’s bath. I had to crash so I told them I was going to go sleep. The aide did my dishes and washed Danni’s bedding as I rested.
I lay in bed and thought about the events of the day, and the day wasn’t even over yet! How blessed we are, how truly blessed! Only in Topeka, small town America! We are truly blessed here in this land!
The truth is these firemen have been out to the house countless times ready and willing to do all they could for us and I want to acknowledge their compassion and dedication, they are a great bunch of guys and Topeka is a better place to live because of their service!
Not only all this but a hot meal was delivered to our door around dinner time with some yummy chocolate brownies and ice cream! Oh help me Jesus!
I was once again blessed beyond belief!
Father, I thank you for all you are doing in our community, thank you for these guys who dedicate their lives to serve for little to nothing in return. Thank you for sending us such good people to take extra special care of Danni from the aides to the nurses, doctors, EMTs and firemen. Thank you for all the love you’ve poured out over our family.
You are faithful and I can hardly wait to see the good things you will continue to do, keeping every promise the word speaks. Father, in childlike faith I ask for a miracle healing for Danni and I acknowledge all the miracles we and the community have already experienced on this journey.
I believe you, Father, for your word says if we agree about anything we ask for it will be done for us by you! (Matthew 18:19) We agree and wait eagerly for you to respond, all for the purpose of more souls for the kingdom in accordance with the heart of your word. AMEN! AMEN! AMEN!
Praises Along the Way--Go Team!
October 24,2008
We had a good meeting with the hospice gals last night. I will have an aide that comes every day for 3 hours so that will give me time to get out or sleep whatever I will need.
Danni had a good day yesterday morning but she's sleeping quite a bit already today. I feel in the swing of things and God is giving me grace to do the all day all night thing. I feel rested and at peace. God is answering your prayers.
It has been good for the kids to see everyone working together as one troop, dad and step-mom, mom and step-dad, grandparents and step-grandparents, friends, neighbors, and community. They are learning invaluable lessons about life and living and loving your neighbor as yourself. Literal love lessons straight from 1 Corinthians 13 played out before thier eyes and they themselves are walking there too. Even though the circumstances are bad this is an awesome training ground not just for the kids but for all who are involved.
I would like to honor the grandmas especially; I praise God for them they have been a God-send to me. Doing laundry and dishes, visiting at the hospital and giving tirelessly of themselves. Early on my mom was here for a length of time and when she left Danni's dad's mom stepped up to the plate and has been helping since then. Even Danni's step-grandparents have been very supportive.
Pray for the grandmas today, would ya, pray that God's loving arms would be around them in a special way. Pray for special blessings upon them. They are the quiet ones in the background that need to be lifted up as well. Next week my mom will be back to stay for a while again so we look forward to her being here with us. Pray for her safe and comfortable travel as she's coming on the bus (18 hours straight, yikes).
I continue to marvel at the love God shows to us every day through all our family, friends and neighbors. I want to thank him that he doesn't leave us alone during these times but provides all we need through this remarkable network. It is a thing of beauty to behold seen clear as crystal in the face of adversity.
Labor of Love
October 23, 2008
Its been a long night and day but worth all the hard work to have her home. This afternoon the hospice people will be here to set her up in their system so hopefully I'll have just one more night of doing it alone, well, Matt was a tremendous help.
I've also gotten a lot of help from neighbors and friends. Running errands, helping me to change bedding and move Danni and even sleeping with cell phone in hand ready to run in the middle of the night if I need help.
What an awesome community God has placed us in and what an awesome group of exceptional people who put feet to their faith! They are even organizing meals for every other day for a while. I am overwhelmed with their loving-kindness. May God bless them abundantly as well as all of you who faithfully pray for Danni all day and even several times a day.
Coming Home Today!
October 22, 2008
Danni is coming home this morning by ambulance. She still has pneumonia but it seems the breathing treatments, exercises and antibiotics are keeping it from progressing too much.
We continue to wait for her healing to break forth like the dawn. Last night she was more chipper and for the first time in almost 2 weeks felt like being on her computer.
Last night, however, was pretty rough for her she had some trouble with panic attacks and didn't sleep very well. I'm hoping when we get her home she'll get more rest.
This time around I'll have the help of hospice so any thoughts of not being able to do this have faded away. Once again God is in control and he is leading the way. We wait upon him.
Thank you for your continued prayers.
Praises Along the Way--She's Got a Hand to Hold...
October 21, 2008
IS 42:5-9 This is what God the Lord says-
he who created the heavens and stretched them out,
who spread out the earth and all that comes out of it,
who gives breath to its people,
and life to those who walk on it:
I, the Lord, have called you in righteousness;
I will take hold of your hand.
I will keep you and will make you
to be a covenant for the people
and a light for the Gentiles,
to open eyes that are blind,
to free captives from prison
and to release from the dungeon those who sit in darkness.
"I am the Lord; that is my name!
I will not give my glory to another
or my praise to idols.
See, the former things have taken place,
and new things I declare;
before they spring into being
I announce them to you."
I found this scripture yesterday and it made me think of Danni. From the very beginning she said to me that "God would be there holding her hand all the way."
How perfectly this scripture speaks to that effect. It also goes on to say why he will hold her hand so as to be a light to the Gentiles, to those who don't know him. God wants to set them free from blindness, prisons and dungeons just as he has done for every one of us who have believed in him.
All through his Son and his Spirit doing the work within her; not that it has that much to do with her but it is according to his plan and his word for those who don't know him so that they can see him. He will have the glory in this situation!
Every day to everyone who encounters Danni she is a sign to them that life is short and that today is the day of salvation! People don't know how to react or what to say when confronted with mortality. Some push it out of their minds as some of you are doing now. Some are too distracted with the goings on of life to stop long enough to think about the end of life.
But God is speaking to us through Danni every day whether she says anything or not, he is in control and he is the giver of breath! Today, if you hear what he's speaking to you through my words, don't harden your hearts towards him. Confess to him your need for him and invite him into your heart; acknowledge him as Creator God of the Universe, acknowledge that Jesus is his son and that he died and was raised to life to save us and he will give you new life.
He'll set you free from the bondage of darkness, sin and shame. He'll bring you into his marvelous light out of blindness and free you from your prison and release you from the dark dungeon your life has become. I know this from experience for he did it for me.
If you think,"My life is okay, I don't need him or this," that's fine but Danni will still be here to remind you that life can change at any time and your life is in God's hands.
He decides if you will take you next breath. Are you ready?
Plugging Away
October 20, 2008
Danni is getting better is my confession of faith.
Here are some earthly technicalities:
Tests show that her white blood count is up a bit and she had a low grade fever during the night. The doctor is going to make some calls to a pulminary doctor and also he will address the stint issue. We think it has been in long enough (2 months was the max) and that maybe is causing the white blood count to come up.
In the mean time, we wait to hear what the doctors have decided.
Good News
October 18, 2008
From the Doctor....we are seeing improvement on her xrays! Praise God! He is healing her!
Peace and Quiet
October 18, 2008
Today Danni is resting quite a bit. I'm sitting in her room at the hospital and she's sleeping soundly as the oxygen hisses and bubbles in the background. She has a nice quiet private room for which I praise God.
She has been doing well on her breathing treatments and is comfortable.
Matt and I have planned to go on a date today to celebrate our 3rd anniversary. What a wild ride it has been! Nevertheless, I love him more each day. Danni's grandma will pop in on her a couple of times today to check on her as she lives here in town.
I think this will be a very restful day for Danni. And a very blessed day for Matt and I.
Blessings to you all as well!
Praises Along the Way--Rough Day But Getting Better!
October 17, 2008
The morning started out calm until my cell phone rang and it was Danni. Her step-mom was supposed to be with her but due to a migraine she could not go so Danni called to tell me that the doctor wanted to talk to me. He had moved on to his other patients so I jumped into the shower and while I was in there the phone tag began.
When I got in touch with the doctor he said that he was concerned about her. She had a pocket of fluid between her lung and the wall of her chest cavity. Oh man! I about dropped my phone because I was attempting to finish getting ready to go as I was talking to him. Thank God it didn't hang up!
He wanted to have a short procedure done where he would have another doctor put a needle through her back into the the chest cavity to draw the fluid off. He wanted to do the procedure in twenty minutes, I told him I'd be there within thirty and he said they would wait until then.
I tore down the stairs grabbing my things I wanted to take with me and ran out the door. I just had to get to Sharky. After a short drive, I was at the hospital and they took me back to the room where she was laying on a gurney in a dimly lit area with the ultrasound humming.
I went in and gave my things to a girl to take up to Danni's room, after a short time they began to sterilize the spot where the doctor would insert the needle. I stood beside Danni and held her hand. I prayed for her, I prayed for the doctor, I prayed and prayed.
It didn't take long for the doctor to be done and after a short x ray to make sure everything was okay she was taken back up to her room. She was amazing! God was there with his peace and comfort! She's so brave! He makes her brave, He makes her amazing!
Later that day a friend came to lay hands on her and pray for healing for her. Once again the presence of God was present with healing in his wings. That friend was not the only one to come and lay hands on her for healing this week.
Also, when I needed a boost, a ray, some confirmation to hold to what I have believed from the beginning God sent another friend who was miraculously healed of a brain tumor to give me a hug and testify to Danni. All this happened this week! I thank and I praise God for the way he moves upon the hearts of his people to bring encouragement to those of his children who need it, just when it's needed!
I believe and though I don't see with my eyes the healing complete, I proclaim my faith in this matter that God is faithful and he began the healing process with her today. I want to live by faith and not by what my weak and feeble earthly eyes see.
Now, join your faith with mine and speak faith about Danni from your lips as well! God is healing her! No matter what we see, God is healing her! Let's live the word and see where God takes us! Amen!
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