November 22, 2008
It had been a good day, or so we thought, Danni had everyone in stitches! She was her ornery self joking with everyone. The problem came at 1 in the morning when she couldn’t stop talking… “How do I relax, mom?” she said. She couldn’t stop talking, her chest was hurting, “heart hurt, heart hurt,” was what she said to me.
“My side hurts and my shoulder, 7, 8, 9,” she went on to say indicating the level of pain from 1 to 10, 10 being the most painful. I called the nurse, apparently her anxiety had been building all day and night into the next morning, I knew that something wasn’t right.
We determined that Danni had a tolerance to the anxiety meds she was taking and needed something different, they weren't working anymore.
I sat by her bed and held her hand to keep her from picking at herself from mounting anxiety. She fought with every breath to keep herself calm. Prayer came forth from her spirit like I have never heard from her.
“Father, give me the strength and courage I need to be more like you, touch and heal me, take the pain from my side.. help me to be more like you, give me courage and strength so that I can lead people to you…help so and so thank you for giving them the understanding to help us understand the scriptures…give them courage and strength to be more like you and do your will….”
On and on she went using her labored breath to pray for herself to be more like her heavenly father and praying with honest concern for others. I sat there amazed at what I was hearing, the Spirit inside of her was taking control and taking the awful circumstances she was in to cause her to cry out to him to be more like him, to bless others, to protect others and to make good come from bad.
At three we knew the nurse would be on her way with the new anxiety meds and I couldn’t take it anymore. I was exhausted and Matt said, “Go to bed, I’ll sit with her.” As he sat with her she was whispering things to him. He couldn’t hear what she was saying so he got down so he could hear clearly. “Do you think Mal and Wes will be okay?” she said “You tell them I’m praying for them every day…”
Mal and Wes are Danni’s step-sister and brother, Matt’s children. Matt broke. Once again her concern with the breath she had was for someone else. This doesn’t come from her as an individual but from the Holy Spirit that lives within her.
Romans 8:26 says, “In the same way the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express…”
He comes along side; he walks with us and even prays for us! What a vivid expression of this we witnessed as the Holy Spirit rose in Danni and prayed through her prayers of faith and deliverance. It was a beautiful, awe inspiring thing to behold.
The word is true! We can put our faith in it! We can believe what it says! What a comfort in such a dark time to see that God was still in control. As bad as the circumstances were, the Spirit was revealing himself to us through Danni.
The nurse came around 7am and administered the new meds to her and I’m told she went right to sleep. She was exhausted and so were we but what a privilege to actually see the deposit of the Holy Spirit within her guaranteeing what is to come! (2 Corinthians 1:22, 2 Cor. 5:5 and Ephesians 1:14) What rest for a mother’s heart.
November 22, 2008