June 8, 2009
Today, I sit in the silence of my living room with the hum of the refrigerator in the background in a beautiful breeze blowing from the front to the back of the house and I’m thinking about Danni’s life. She was so strong and beautiful even to the end. How did she develop into such a wonderful creature?
I can’t believe that it has been more than six months since she went on to be with the Lord. Recently, we have shared many memories of her as a family. It is interesting to see the things that trigger such memories. Something as simple as eating a certain way or a look on my daughter’s face can remind us of the silly things she used to do.
Jessi, my daughter, can imitate Danni’s “T-Rex” dance to a tee! She would sit in her wheelchair and sway her head from side to side while punching out her arms. Though it’s hard to describe believe me when I say it brings a smile to my face. Danni just found other ways to do the things she wanted to do.
She was so sweet; I have so many fond thoughts about her. I thank God for experiences with her that can never be erased or taken from me. Some days I forget how precious life is. Circumstances take over and I don’t live every day to the fullest as I should. God forgive me.
I have days where self-pity takes the day and it is then when God reminds me that I have not suffered unto blood. (Hebrews 12:4) Self-pity is too expensive, I can’t afford it. Danni didn’t pity herself in all she suffered. She wouldn’ t allow me to feel sorry for her either. Whenever I would say that I was sorry she had to go through this she would say, “why, it’s not your fault.”
I was writing a speech I’ve been asked to give for the Relay for Life organization in Lagrange Indiana this weekend and I was reminded of her words when she was asked what she had learned from all she had been through. Her answer was, “Trust God and never give up.” This had to come from the Spirit of God within her. The human in us, our old nature, sits in our stuff and wallows.
Her mental attitude was more than half the battle, it was everything. God kept her strong and helped her to see clearly. What an awesome gift! God doesn’t leave us alone during our times of tribulation but he is there by our side waiting for us to reach out to him.
My prayer is that I can withstand the rest of life’s challenges and tests as she did with grace and dignity, humor and humility. God’s work in her life was simply remarkable. God is real and his word really works we just have to believe it. God even equips us to do what pleases him. (Hebrews 13:21 and Philippians 2:13)
I think this pep talk is mostly for my benefit today, sometimes you have to build yourself up in your faith, and give yourself a talking to! It’s a good to remind yourself who God is and what he has done!